Monday, February 20, 2012

My Lord Shiva!


The time when I was 9 years old, I had no much exposure to religion or spirituality but had great faith in God. I do not want to specify any particular religion or race here as I believe in the only race “humanity” and only power beyond the reach of humanity called “God”. I don’t remember much but let me try to recollect …. For my school annual day, I was to perform a dance. A kindaa “shivatandavam”. It’s believed that Lord Shiva is a great dancer and the way he dances is called “Shivatandavam”. I was proud to be selected for Shivatandavam. Not because I had exceptional dancing skills but because there was my junior who was good at classical dance and she had to play the role of Parvathi.  My height and so-so dancing skills got me the opportunity to play the role of Shiva. Rigorous dance practices for me as I had to play it well. My dance teacher and my junior both had helped me pick up classical style. My school aaya who had seen me dance told me about lord Shiva when I was simply loitering around in free time. I don’t remember what she told me exactly but I wanted to know more about Shiva since then. I asked my mom and grand ma and very soon was inclined to Shiva. Watching TV serial “Om namah Shivaya” must have had an influence too. Since then he has been my best friend.  

When I was 17 years old, I had gone to river Godavari Pushkaralu and happened to listen partially to a song on Lord Shiva that I want to present here. Definitely not like a song but the meaning. Thinking more on Shiva, I knew this is the form of god I would like.

Context of the song: A poor farmer wakes up in the morning and wants to ask Shiva for something very much apt to improve his life style.

What a nice morning but see my rough bed.
The privileged get soft bed.
How good would it be for me to have a better bed! May be live in a place…
Let me ask Shiva to bless me with it.

I close my eyes to see….
Lord Shiva himself sleeps on ice or spends nights in the graveyard. He for sure has no blanket.
He has no palace or interiors done. He lives on the snow hills “Kailasam”.
Oh no I cant ask him for this.
He doesn’t have it and doesn’t make it though he can.
So even I shall not need it.

I looked at my clothes and feel
How good would it be if I had bright colored silk clothes?
Precious stone studded jewelry and footwear.
Let me ask Shiva to bless me with all this.

I close my eyes to see….
Lord Shiva himself wears only animal skin. His hair is not combed. He has no jewelry.
Oh no I cant ask him for accessories.
He doesn’t have it and doesn’t make it though he can.
So even I shall not need it.

I looked at myself in the mirror and feel
How good would it be had I had good looks.
Majestic build, lustrous skin and beauty. 
Let me ask Shiva to bless me with all this.

I close my eyes to see….
Look at what lord Shiva uses for his skin! Ashes from the graves!
He who is the most striking personality, takes “lingakara”. (shown in the picture)
His hair is not combed since long and he did not bother to keep the most venomous “halahalam”
In his throat and it turned his throat blue.
Oh no I cant ask him for this.
I am happy with the personality he has given and shall not bother how it withers away.

But!! What can I ask him for?
He is the happiest. See what he does.
AHhhh… just concentrates on …….
What does he want? What does he concentrate for?

And here I get the answers
If ultimate happiness is my goal,
There shall be nothing that can make me sad.
Only when I want something, shall something that keeps me away from it, hinder my happiness.
If I want nothing, what can you snatch from me to make me sad!!

I am a human. The life in me shall crave for food and water to sustain.
Life in me is given by you. I cant be cruel to it.
Only if I have enough to eat, drink , sleep and have the sound mind to keep desires under control,
That’s enough.
So Shiva, bless me with a mind that can ask for nothing yet be happy.

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